Week 16: Famous In Our Own Minds Pick’em — Consistency Is King (Unfortunately for Jay)
If there’s one thing you can count on in an unpredictable NFL season, it’s this: Jay going 1–2. For the eighth straight week, Jay somehow threaded the needle again, finishing 1–2 with a level of precision that borders on performance art. At this point, sportsbooks should investigate. Scientists should study it. It’s quite possibly the most impressive feat in sports betting history — not because it’s good, but because it is relentlessly the same. Jeff also posted a 1–2 week, proving that while mediocrity loves company, it does not love improvement. Meanwhile, Jack — once the unquestioned laughingstock of this operation — continued his redemption arc with a 2–1 week and now finds himself alone atop the standings.
Jay Ballard
12/19/20252 min read
Updated Standings:
1.Jack: 22–23
2. Jeff: 21–23–1
3. Jay: 20–24
Yes, the man who was ridiculed mercilessly in September is now the leader. Football is cruel.
Jay’s Picks
Eagles -6.5 at Washington
Jay is trusting motivation and recent history here. Philadelphia can clinch the division with a win, and they’ve mostly owned Washington in recent meetings. With the Commanders lacking JD5 and having nothing meaningful left to play for, Jay sees a focused Eagles team handling business. Sensible. Logical. Which probably means it loses.
Chiefs at Titans OVER 37.5
This is where Jay gets spicy. With Patrick Mahomes injured and Gardner Minshew expected to take over, the total has been pushed way down. Jay believes that creates value. With nothing to play for, both teams may loosen up, take chances, and accidentally score points. Also, don’t look now, but the Titans offense has shown faint signs of life — which is usually when Jay gets burned. Still, 37.5 is a low bar.
Chargers +2.5 at Dallas
A classic “this line makes no sense” game. The Chargers, in Jay’s eyes, are the better team and are getting points. Normally that’s a red flag. Normally Jay would run the other way. Instead, he’s charging straight into traffic. Chargers outright, he says, because pain is familiar.
Jeff’s Picks
Steelers at Lions OVER 51.5
Points, points, and more points. The Lions score plenty and give up plenty, and even an ancient Aaron Rodgers should be capable of contributing just enough chaos to push this one over. Jeff expects fireworks and a defense-free environment. What could go wrong?
Falcons -2.5 at Cardinals
Two teams that probably should be tanking but won’t admit it. Jeff is taking the team with the best player on the field — and conveniently, that player is also on his fantasy roster. Bijan Robinson is the logic, the reason, and the emotional hedge.
Patriots +3 at Baltimore
Jeff expects a bounce-back from New England after the Buffalo loss and thinks the Ravens’ playoff hopes take a real hit here. Lamar hasn’t looked right, and Jeff believes Drake Maye makes a prime-time statement. Confidence is high. Dangerously high.
Jack’s Picks
Packers at Bears OVER 46.5
Jack sees division stakes, offensive weapons, and enough defensive injuries to make the over appealing. Both teams need it, both teams can score, and Jack isn’t overthinking it.
Saints -4.5 vs Jets
The Jets are bad. Like, really bad. Jack isn’t even sure they score. The Saints are suddenly competent, at home, and laying less than a touchdown. Jack calls it easy money and predicts a blowout.
Texans -14.5 vs Raiders
Big number, no fear. Jack expects C.J. Stroud and Nico Collins to keep cooking, tag-teaming touchdowns and pulling away early. It’s a bold cover — and exactly the kind of confidence you get when you’re in first place.
Closing Recap
So we roll into another week with the standings tighter than Jay’s grip on that cursed 1–2 record. Jack sits alone in first at 22–23, playing with confidence and absolutely no shame. Jeff is right behind at 21–23–1, waiting for a Lamar wobble or a Bijan breakout. And then there’s Jay at 20–24, chasing the mythical 2–1 like it’s Bigfoot — rumored, blurry, and never confirmed. Will consistency finally break? Will Jack complete the greatest redemption story of our time? Or will Jeff quietly grind his way to the top? One thing is certain: we’ll all have strong opinions, questionable logic, and very little success. And that’s why we’re Famous In Our Own Minds.